THE VIEW THAT AWAITS ME

I am not always sure whether the path I am IS the best one for me. I mean, I do know, but of course my CONDITIONED self would have me BELIEVE another story completely. And I have found that the moment you can actually the energy of your heart's centre open, when you can feel your soul ALIVE WITHIN YOU, ego comes at you full force, naturally, because ego cannot breathe when you breathe from your soul, from your SPIRIT. 

I spent last weekend at THE I CAN DO IT 2014 conference, hosted by Hay House. I was surrounded by some completely wondrous souls, Dr. Wayne Dyer, CAROLINE MYSS, Robert Holden, NANCY LEVIN, Alex Woodard, ANITA MOORJANI, to name a few!! You could say the weekend was BEAUTIFUL, at the very least. 

I have spent most of my LIFE, IN ALL HONESTY, lost. Whether I had been actually aware of that statement or not. I had spent 23 years on a quest to reconnect to myself, to UNVEIL who I was, not the ego PROJECTED IDEAL of who I was, but me, my SPIRIT, at the depths of my core. There has been a lot of ups, and there has been a lot of downs. But here I am, about to celebrate my 25th year, and I now understand why I AM HERE. I now know that to have been lost, was a great GIFT. 

(Takes some REMINDING every now and then!!) I now know that all of those moments that brought me to my knees, well they were the MOUNTAINS I HAD TO CLIMB, so that I would be able to clearly see THE VIEW THAT AWAITED ME. 

Once the conference was over, I knew I had a lot to reflect on, I knew a lot had been brought to the forefront. And what stood out the most, after almost nearly every speaker, was YES. YES to my path, to my Journey, to the MOUNTAINS I HAVE CLIMBED and to the ones I have yet to embark on. THIS was why I am here. Not only to reconnect to myself, to my BEING, my SPIRIT, but to hold the hands of others who walk the same Journey, of those who have found themselves at the bottom of a MOUNTAIN. 

There's a strong BELIEF that we are all separate, that we have to walk alone, or stay WITHIN OUR DESIGNATED CIRCLES. But we are ONE, we are SO INNATELY connected. We all have our own path that has been created for us, but we can walk together, hold one another up, hold each others hands as we RISE from the ashes. We can be each others greatest healers, and soul lovers.

I looked around at all of the people who were there, all ages, male & female, all walks of life really, and yet we all yearned for the same. We all wanted to know we are loved, that we are worthy, that we have a 'spark of god' WITHIN ourselves. So how could we be separate? I knew as I left Vancouver, and made my way back to my humble ISLAND, that I had to honour my FIRE-LIT SPIRIT, that I had to honour the call that has become so very clear WITHIN me, to fearlessly love myself, and all of those I encounter. I may not have always known what the UNIVERSE had IN STORE for me, but my God,  the truth that LIFE IS SO COMPLETELY BEAUTIFUL, feeds a hunger WITHIN MY SOUL. 

SHIT AIN'T EASY

We all have those moments, the ones that take us aback. I have them more often than not. I have come to understand that once you have awakened, there's nowhere to go back to. You cannot go back to sleep so to speak, or close your eyes to the truth all around you, to your soul, to your purpose. At least that has been my own story.

To be 'awakened' does not mean you are free from fear, or free of sorrow, for me anyways. I am only HIGHLY aware now of my fear, and of my sorrow. To be that aware of how you feel, to be the one who now observes your fear, your old thought patterns, does not always come easy. There are days that are naturally really hard. I have come across many blogs, many awesome teachers, and sources of self-love Journeys and the art of HEALING, but to be completely honest, I get a sense that they are not all that honest. I have found that a lot of people portray a perfect path, and only half of the truth that brought them to that place of love. If you are here, and you were GUIDED here for some reason, there's a good chance that you know exactly what I mean. 

This journey we are on, the one of self-awareness, self-love, MINDFULNESS, and HEALING, well, SHIT AIN'T EASY, to be completely frank. Oh I could talk days about the RESISTANCE that comes up when you walk forward to a place of Inner Peace. How the moment you feel as though you totally know what's up now, there's a whole new lesson for you to learn, and those lessons can knock you down, that's for sure. But we get back up, we do, but I have found that not everyone talks about that part, the part where we fall down. Where ego catches us off guard, where we feel small, or when we wonder when we'll get past the 'hard' part. 

Everyone has a story of there own, and maybe we do not all feel the need to share the parts of ourselves we are not so proud of, but I want to, as vulnerable as that makes me feel. Yes, I could totally go on and on about how perfect my path has been, how every day I feel so connected and groovy, and how the world comes easy to me now, but that would not be my truth. And I am not sure I could really serve anyone or even myself from a place that's not fully AUTHENTIC. 

So, to the moments that take us aback. Well, today was full of those sort of moments for me. Self-doubt came to play, and self-love took a seat on the bench. You see, I have a lot of dreams, I am a huge dreamer, and a heart so full of love to share, and when I am grounded, I know I am worthy of all of those dreams and more. However, when I am not grounded, when for whatever reason I feel off, ego pulls out the most fearful parts of me. The parts of me that I open myself up to heal everyday. The part of me that's beyond scared to fully go after my dreams, to fully put myself out there, to be seen. 

Today was not a bad day, nor would I say today was a good day. Today was exactly what I chose today to be when I really look closely. Why was I so hard on myself today? On my appearance, on my path, on my Inner CHILD? Because I had lessons I needed to learn. There's always a lesson to learn. And that's how we grow. That's how we become the heroes of our own story. That's how change takes place. Change does not happen because every day's perfect, or because we put on a mask to cover up the parts of us we don't want others to see. Change comes when we choose to be fearless, even when we are fearful. 

Maybe you have moments that come up for you, that make you doubt yourself, that make you doubt the path that you are on. The only words I have for you, are to TRUST. Trust what the UNIVERSE has planned for you, what your God has planned for you. And I understand that that's not always easy, I fully understand that, but when you choose to trust the lessons that have been brought your way, there's usually a sense of support you'll feel all around you, a presence, an energy, that wants to help you flow as effortlessly through the lessons as you can. Ego and our need to control are usually what makes us struggle the way we do. So, TRUST. Trust yourself, SOURCE, angels, Mother Nature, love, and TRUST that you are exactly where you are supposed to be, even when you cannot understand why. 

Peace + Love

For an awesome post about detachment and Trust, check out KRISTIN HEDGES blog post here!! Her words helped me a lot today!! 

Only Love's Real

Masks, who we feel we are supposed to be, and who everyone else wants us to be. The face we put on to make the rest of the world happy, the perfect person who only feels HAPPINESS. We have all been there, or we know someone who has. I know for me, personally, I have had to really go deep WITHIN myself and accept that I am enough exactly as I am. I have come to a place where I know the only way I can be truly happy, and at harmony's when I am my AUTHENTIC self. What does that mean?

For me, to be my AUTHENTIC self means to accept all parts of me. The good and the bad (or at least what we have been made to see as bad), the LIGHT and the dark. All of the energy and love that flows through me, and all of the sadness and sorrow I have to face so that I may heal. These are all parts of me, and they all make up who I am. The moment I allow myself to accept myself, fully, and completely, then I can allow the energy that does not serve me to pass through. 

I am a VIBRANT soul, a person who dreams of love and knows love can heal us all. A person who feels every EMOTION, and feels most at home when I am at peace WITHIN myself, and when I am surrounded by POSITIVE, wondrous, souls, and loved ones. But I have days when I feel sad, really sad, and days when I feel angry, and scared, and unsure. I know these are all an ILLUSION, that they are not real, because ONLY LOVE'S REAL. I know these EMOTIONS are there for a reason, that I feel them for a reason. To learn from, to accept, and move forward from. We are all a makeup of the energy we feel, and the energy we must release, so that we may grow and blossom. And yet we are taught that we are supposed to have IT ALL TOGETHER always.

Perhaps we are meant to feel, really feel how we feel, and feel the energy that comes up for us, so that we can LOVINGLY love all parts of ourselves, and trust that we are love. 

How can we get to the place of INNER peace and self-acceptance when we are so scared to AUTHENTICALLY be ourselves?

 To be real, completely honest, and own our struggles as much as we own our successes. The moment you accept your struggles, no matter how bad they may seem, as a BEAUTIFUL part of your path to ENLIGHTENMENT then you start to take the shame away. And all those ILLUSIONS that seem to keep us stuck, well they start to fade away more and more. At the end of the day we all go through what we are meant to go through, and the MAGICAL part's that we can take our power back, moment by moment, when accept ourselves fully. When we start to change what we see as good and bad, to STEPPING STONES to our truth, to our love. How can you start to be AUTHENTICALLY you now? Maybe when someone asks you how you feel, be honest, whether you feel truly happy and great, or maybe sad, or you have low energy, maybe that you are HEALING. There's so much beauty that comes from honesty. When we let go of the need to PAINT THE PERFECT PICTURE, and see that we are perfectly IMPERFECT the way that we are. 

Take down the mask, let go of the person you feel you are supposed to be, the person someone wants you to be, and open your  heart to who you are, to the love that you are. There are days we all need rest, days we need a hand to help us through, and then there are days that we SHINE, that our souls RADIATE. Maybe we can learn to accept that together, accept that we are awesome, even when we cannot see past all the other B.S. Accept that when we are AUTHENTICALLY ourselves we learn to truly love ourselves, and when we truly love ourselves, we come back home, come back to that peaceful place where we know and feel that only loves real. 

Sweet sweet MAGIC

>Photo by Tessa Barton Photography<

The truth does not always come to us as we may have IMAGINED. Our paths and our soul's purpose do not always come to us the way we would want them to. PATIENCE, that's the key. Add an open-hearted SPIRIT and the truth always comes. And what makes your soul sparkle flows to you naturally. 

The funny part's that for me, the hardest part's to trust that I know my truth. To trust that I am on the path that has been so BEAUTIFULLY created for me. Ego wants us to create endless amounts of B.S. that only detour us from our truth, from our endless love, from the MAGICAL souls that we are. I do my best to remember to connect to my breath, to really feel my breath as I INHALE, and as I EXHALE. So often we forget to breathe, or at least I know I do. And I mean really breathe the sort of breath that centres you, grounds you,connects you to all that serves you and your purpose of love. The sort of breath that allows you to be MINDFUL. 

Sweet, sweet MAGIC. Breathe that sort of breath. 

Our breath, our truth,our soul's sparkle, our SPIRIT, our true purpose, they are all so completely connected. And I feel as though they all come together so wonderfully the moment we choose to trust. Trust that PRIMAL part of us that knows us better than anyone else ever could,that knows what sets our soul's on FIRE. You know you have felt that when all you want to do's shout out to the world YES,I have found what connects and grounds me to JOY.

A JOY that stems from pure,sacred love. 

I have learnt that for me, personally, PATIENCE can save you. When you let go of the need to force outcomes. When you completely surrender to what the UNIVERSE has planned for you. What GOD has planned for you, whatever GOD means to you. Trust. And TRUST that you have been GUIDED to exactly where you are at THIS VERY MOMENT for a reason. Open you heart and trust. Trust your truth. And as always, breathe. Breathe that sweet,sweet MAGICAL breath. 

The art of FORGIVENESS

It was not that long ago that I truly thought that to FORGIVE someone was weakness on my part, that that somehow reflected onto me as not strong enough. I thought that to forgive someone was for them, that the purpose was to let them off the hook for however you may have felt wronged. 

When I started my Journey, or as the awesome Brene Brown would say, my breakdown spiritual awakening, I learnt that to FORGIVE was about my Inner peace and my peace only. I learnt that the art of forgiveness allowed me the chance to move past LIMITING BELIEFS and become whole. Somewhere along our paths, we start to harness a whole lot of resentment, anger, and overall sorrow. We tend to hold grudges, and replay over and over why we are 'mad' or how awful that person was to us.

If I could go back, I would tell myself to let go, to forgive. To hang on to all that sorrow, you really only hang onto stagnant energy that does not serve you, that actually does a whole lot of harm to you and your soul, to your true essence. 
The art of forgiveness does not let the other person off the hook, you let yourself off the hook. You allow yourself to move forward, to put forth your energy towards your true heart's DESIRES. You bestow upon yourself a MIRACULOUS GIFT.

And the real beauty comes when we choose to surrender to forgiveness, and we actually forgive ourselves, for whatever the reasons may be. That's when the beauty of true self acceptance starts to play, and eventually peace and wholeness starts to dance at our feet. For me, personally, the moment I forgave those I felt had wronged me, so much old energy was released and I had created space for growth, for a fresh start. I took back my power. 

I chose to no longer attach myself to my past. And my sorrow no longer had an RSVP and a plus one to my future. I knew I had a story to tell, and I wanted that story to be my truth,and the only way to my truth was to release all that no longer served me. It has not always been easy, and I have to remember the exact words that I type here day to day. That's why we PRACTICE. 

So, maybe, when you come across an event that would normally cause you to harness anger or sadness or even fear, send love and LIGHT to yourself, and to whomever was apart of the event. Take a deep breathe, and ask yourself whether that energy serves you, whether your peace's worth that resentment. ALL we have to do's be WILLING. Show up, and say to yourself or even out loud, 

I am ready to FORGIVE, I am open to FORGIVENESS, I am at peace. 

Take a deep breathe, and allow your INNER GUIDANCE to take care of you. 

Pure + sacred act of acceptance

Self-love's such a pure and sacred act of acceptance. There's a freedom that naturally flows from that, and I pray that everyone gets to feel that. I pray that anyone and everyone who has ever felt unworthy, know's that they are more than worthy. We have to let go of what we are taught to see as beauty.

To me, beauty's an energy, beauty stems from the love that you are. From the love you have for yourself and for all others. 

Love yourself always, and allow your true beauty to be seen. 

Dear Wondrous Soul

 Dear wondrous soul, the one who knows that love's all you need, who knows we are all one. Allow yourself the chance to be set free. Perhaps, you can allow your soul to expand from all of the corners of who you are. 
Be your truth, allow yourself to be present + allow the FIRE that grows WITHIN you to become the heat source of love that connects us all. Open your heart, dear one, and allow yourself to be fearless. Take that leap, connect to your true self + know above all else, that LOVE always GUIDES us back home. 

>Photo Found on Tumblr<